Aries & Capricorn
Ever heard this phrase: “two wrongs don’t make a right?” A relationship between Aries and Capricorn is proof. The impulsive and stubborn Aries could easily unravel any of the organized plans that you have come up with for your future, right Capricorn? Don’t worry, we are sure that you have enough time in your never-ending schedule to fix whatever problems that Aries makes. Though, Aries, you would never let them help you with your problems, not with that enormous ego that you’ve been carrying around with you. Capricorn, you’re a homebody at heart and that just won’t align with Aries’s impulsive nature. While Aries craves constant change, Capricorn despises it. The two of you are two different sides of the coin. At least your two type-A personalities will mesh perfectly to annoy the heck out of the rest of us.
Sagittarius & Virgo
Oh, Sagittarius, you are setting yourself up for failure if you think entering a relationship with Virgo is a good idea. With your “one-of-a-kind” attitude and desire to be the most unique person in the room, a relationship with the overly critical Virgo is almost sure to crumble. Every plan made by meticulous planner Virgo would drive Sagittarius insane, and any spur of the moment adventure would be too much for Virgo. One small disagreement between the pair would be certain death for the relationship with your vastly different approaches to conflict. What we mean is, Virgo, they are often too naive to handle the unforgiving commentary that you love to dish. A sensitive and optimistic soul like Sagittarius is no match for the scathing remark of a temperamental Virgo.
Libra & Leo
What a great pairing you two make (note: heavy sarcasm). Libra, are you going to stay with Leo, or are they just another notch while you wait to see who else is available? This couple will show every couple exactly what they are missing: a self-absorbed narcissist focused on being the sole focus of their partner’s attention, and an indecisive, moody people-pleaser. How are the two of you ever going to get anything done? A selfish lion is bound to eat a selfless wolf alive. Perhaps the two of you would be better suited as business partners. For Leo, a business where you are the demanding boss that drains Libra until they have nothing left to give. It all seems a little too one-sided there, Leo.
Taurus & Aquarius
The uniquely eccentric Aquarius in a relationship? Never we thought we’d see the day. Especially Aquarius in a relationship with the conventional Taurus? Even rarer. We’re surprised that you would allow someone as blunt and constantly disgruntled as Taurus to hold you back, Aquarius. Yet, for someone as understanding and in touch with emotions as you, Taurus, we are certain that Aquarius’ detachment from their own would drive you up a wall. The completely independent Aquarius and extremely possessive Taurus seem like a match made in hell. Aquarius may seem open minded, but only until their own independence is struck down. It will be a war, mark our words.
Gemini & Pisces
We are actually surprised that either of you have managed to get into any type of meaningful relationship given your histories. Between the overly anxious Gemini and the closed off Pisces, there are few discernable ways that we can see that this relationship will flourish. Pisces, your desire to not be understood is going to clash with Gemini in the worst way. How do you expect to have a healthy relationship when communication is one-sided? You thrive on being selfless — too selfless. And Gemini, with the judgmental things that you like to say to and behind others, we think that you may be a little too much for our sensitive Pisces. Between both of your inability to make a decision to save your life, we doubt that we should have any fears that this relationship will start anyhow.
Cancer & Scorpio
I’m sure you two had a great meet-cute, but the emotional mess that ensues after will not be worth it. Cancer, while you are endlessly empathetic and loyal, you honestly aren’t good at expressing it in the way that Scorpio constantly needs to hear from you. Scorpio, you crave an intimacy that Cancer will be too scared to ask for and they may even be feeling threatened by the depth of your other relationships. Scorpio can feel far too secretive and spiritual for Cancer, and the two are likely to constantly feel frustrated by the passive aggressive attitudes from the other. We know being sad is ‘cool’ or whatever, but sadly, two savior complexes cannot fix each other.
The Slate welcomes thoughtful discussion on all of our stories, but please keep comments civil and on-topic. Read our full guidelines here.