SPOILER ALERT: I give you permission to ignore this article if you have not watched the finale of “The Golden Bachelor.” But it aired five days ago; go watch!

Gerry Turner is good television. It is as simple as that. The man dubbed “The Golden Bachelor” has charmed 21 eligible women and millions of viewers, including me, over the past nine weeks.

On Thursday night, Gerry’s story came to a close, and I am struggling to accept the decision that he made. In a silly, goofy and slightly serious breakdown of the premiere episode published in “The Slate” on Oct. 3, I made the bold claim that “I can unequivocally declare that Faith and Gerry are going to walk off into the sunset.”

Boy, was I wrong. Faith made it to the top three women, but then Gerry sent her home. One of the most unique elements of this spinoff was the maturity of all the women and the desire they had to make genuine connections. Seeing Faith and Gerry interact with her family and each say “I love you” in front of them only to watch her heartbreak within the hour was devastating.

I have grown to love Gerry, but blatantly leading Faith on demonstrated that an older man can still have the emotional maturity and wishy-washy attitude of a teenage boy.

And then he did it again.

Gerry traveled to Costa Rica with his final two women, Leslie and Theresa, for a final chance to connect. They also entered the infamous Fantasy Suite, which is thankfully not shown on camera.

We saw Gerry tell Leslie that he believed she was “the one,” only to destroy her when he changed his mind the next day and told her he was choosing Teresa.

Leslie broke down and delivered the most emotional line of the season: “No one chooses me.” She was in love with Gerry and his family and had even picked out a dress and written vows.

Their final date was “the happiest day of my life, except for the day I thought was coming,” Leslie said.

So who did Gerry end up picking? Theresa.

To use some Gen Z slang on a boomer, Theresa gives me the “ick.” And by the reactions of the other contestants seated in the audience at the live finale, I am not alone. From the beginning of the season, Theresa seemed to be trying too hard and gave off bad vibes to the other women. No one clocked her more than Kathy’s instantly iconic “Zip it!”

It just seemed so clear that Gerry made more genuine connections with both Leslie and Theresa, not to mention how similar they looked. They both came across as deeply invested in spending the remainder of their lives with Gerry. To me, Theresa came across as needy and a mean girl at multiple points throughout the season. 

I’ll miss seeing Ellen and Kathy and the rest of the women on my TV every week, and I’ll have to watch Gerry and Theresa’s wedding on Jan. 4, but I won’t miss watching Gerry lead these women on.

It may be “The Golden Bachelor,” but he might as well have handed out a bronze medal.

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